Our Favorite Dog Word: “Fudge!”
Remember this scene from A Christmas Story? Young Ralphie and his father bonding over a flat tire at the curb, the hub cap full of bolts sent soaring deep into the dark, Ralphie yelling “Fuuuuuudge!” … narrating the amendment, “Only I didn’t say fudge.”
My husband and I have had those “Fuuuuuudge!” moments with our dogs, especially when our Newfoundland, Shamus, and his sidekick hound, Emmett, eat “treats” that they shouldn’t.
We’ve actually had this conversation, word for word:
TIM (yelling from dog yard through window): You missing a yellow scrunchy?
KIM: Maybe. Why?
TIM (observing shovel of shit): Want it back?
And there it is. My first thought. “Fuuuuuudge!”
All Right, Dogs. Lessons learned? Nope.
After posting about our frigid, 2-day dog search & rescue, which was frightfully taxing on both our dogs and on us, I received many comments assuming Shamus and Emmett must have learned a valuable lesson. For example, the well-meaning Karen Friesecke of DoggieStylish.com said:
After all that drama I’m sure that they will never stray from home again. Warm and safe at home with Mom and Dad is far more fun than alone and lost in the winter wilderness.
Karen’s sympathetic sentiment was echoed again and again by family and friends. I wish we could believe this were true, but it’s not.
Dogs, unlike humans, are so beautifully Zen-like that being “in the moment” is all they can do. With new proof-positive that my dogs have learned nothing, I share the following story because I do not recommend learning from experience.
Dog Business
I imagine this happening while we’re cruising around South America grabbing new footage for this site. (I’ve pre-scheduled this to post while we’re away.) Bless our house sitters’ hearts and let’s hope we still have a house to come home to.

Newf Frames Hound in Screen Door Scam
THE CRIME SCENE
Accustomed to the freedom of a dog door, a luxury lost when our kittens moved in, the hound and Newf haven’t taken kindly to asking for yard privileges. Much prefering the self-serve option, they have taken matters into their own hands.
It began innocently enough. Emmett, our crafty hound, learned to open the screen from the sun porch to the dog yard. Teaching this trick to the Newf, each would let the other out for a playful romp.
As a result, we are now in lock down: all screens latched, windows barely cracked, and all doors leading to the “land of no return” are barricaded with a highly trained ottoman.
Mud Puppies
Yesterday, I was mopping the day’s mud from the living room floor when Tim came home from work. We looked down at the hardwood and laughed at layer upon layer of footprints. With the break in the weather, mopping can be a thrice daily task. The dogs just keep on tracking globs, smears and grass hunks through the dog door.
I sighed, “Sometimes I think it’s useless to mop before the boys settle in for the night.”
Tim added, “Sometimes I think it’s useless to mop until August.”






